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| Forest Hills Finally Beats Ridge Heights; Wins Game 22-7 |
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by Neal Gough
The Chili Peppers jumped out to an early lead, answering all of the Bombers runs, and
then some, in the first couple of innings. However the tides soon changed as the
defense of the Bombers turned up the heat. Forest Hills short stop “some fucking
Mexican that Mike Gough brought” turned out an impressive performance. (His real
name is not being released at this time, as the GoGo Planet Olympic Committee is still
looking into the alleged legality of his American status.) Other notable glove work was
turned in by Tom “the not gay Terrell” Terrell in right center, the electrifying Joseph
Evansco on third and Matthew “Wheels” Mundy on first. The Bombers bats were also
consistent with big hits being turned in. Corey Willingham turned in an impressive game
at home plate, all with his pants around his calves the entire game.
However the real star of the game was the one no one expected, Kurtis Schreier.
Kurt, or ‘Silverado’ as his fans at Faces Gay Club call him, bravely interrupted an 8-hour
drinking binge to grace the GoGoField with his presence. Kurt’s bat may have been as
inconsistent as his speech, but his fielding was right on line. Kurt showed his value to
the Bombers as he relentlessly called his fellow Chili Peppers off of pop-fly after pop-fly,
and proceeded to not only miss but fall in their path as they attempted to field the fallen
softball. Kurt took his allegiance to the Bombers one step further as he bravely
redirected a blistering line drive from Brokeback Bishop from short stop into the gap in
short center using nothing but the top of his foot. After which he also fell. “Kurt added
an extra two outs to every inning, and he doesn’t remember any of them,” commented
Bombers second basemen Joshua Focker.
Christopher “Tarzan” Corrigan, was brought in to relieve starting pitcher Beau
Andrescavage in the six inning, which is coincidently when he and Billdo showed up from
their all-male gang bang, bought drunk with bleeding assholes. “He doesn’t need any
warm up,” commented Billdo of his burly friend, “He’s been working his rotator cup on me
all morning.” Indeed he didn’t. With a smooth pitch eerily reminiscent of the reach-
around he gave Billdo earlier that morning the Bombers were lead flawlessly through the
last three innings and onto GOGOGOLD.
“There were several key factors that went into the turn around over the past year. I
feel the biggest however, were the offseason trades. We were able to acquire several
key players such as the Ruben Neumann, and even though he didn’t play do to a
nagging vaginal injury he was definitely there in spirit.” Commented team captain Neal
Gough in his post game press conference. “However in my opinion the biggest
difference was not the players the Bombers acquired but the twat waffles we were able to
get rid of. Steven “Dickhead” Galinski (see picture below) was a huge movc, we were
able to send him to the Chili Peppers were he flied out at ever at bat. The second major
offseason move was the release of Scott Carril, the only player in Olympic history with an
over-the-fence homerun last year. Scott tried at every at bat to duplicate his 30-second
heroics of last year and failed absolutely miserably flying out as often has his closet
lovers Justin Thacker and Dickhead Galinski. Speaking of Scott’s 30-second heroics,
Gen when you’re ready for a real man, Go Go has my number.” Concluded Neal.
After the game and fresh off his mud bath, courtesy of the Chili Peppers, team captain
Neal Gough named Chili Peppers Shortstop/belligerent drunk Kurtis Schreier as the MVP
for all the plays he made to help lead the Bombers to victory. He also gave honorable
mention to several players such Billdo, Tarzan, and Scott Hilpert for leaving their all-male
gangbang early to attend by the sixth inning, Corey and Rosell for moving the birthday
party of their daughter to not interfere with the festivities, Tom “the not gay Terrell”
Terrell for not being the gay Terrell, John Chester for waking up in Fenton 20 minutes
before game-time with no car and a sore asshole, “you should have attended the same
all-male gang bang as Scott, Tarzan and Billdo, it was closer”, Gerald Redden for
forfeiting like a pussy bitch, “you probably would have had an asthma attack walking to
first anyway” Also, last but not least, honorable mention goes to Scott Carril, Steven
“Dickhead” Galinski, and Justin “Roid Rage” Thacker for flying out a combined 15
times.
All in all it was a great day in the scrotum dome. The Bombers inserted their throbbing
cocks into the mouths of the Chili Peppers, gyrated twice, and shot a big load of victory
down the throat of their opponents.
Forest Hills 2 1 5 1 7 4 1 1 0 - 22
Ridge Heights 2 4 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 - 7
The Chili Peppers jumped out to an early lead, answering all of the Bombers runs, and
then some, in the first couple of innings. However the tides soon changed as the
defense of the Bombers turned up the heat. Forest Hills short stop “some fucking
Mexican that Mike Gough brought” turned out an impressive performance. (His real
name is not being released at this time, as the GoGo Planet Olympic Committee is still
looking into the alleged legality of his American status.) Other notable glove work was
turned in by Tom “the not gay Terrell” Terrell in right center, the electrifying Joseph
Evansco on third and Matthew “Wheels” Mundy on first. The Bombers bats were also
consistent with big hits being turned in. Corey Willingham turned in an impressive game
at home plate, all with his pants around his calves the entire game.
However the real star of the game was the one no one expected, Kurtis Schreier.
Kurt, or ‘Silverado’ as his fans at Faces Gay Club call him, bravely interrupted an 8-hour
drinking binge to grace the GoGoField with his presence. Kurt’s bat may have been as
inconsistent as his speech, but his fielding was right on line. Kurt showed his value to
the Bombers as he relentlessly called his fellow Chili Peppers off of pop-fly after pop-fly,
and proceeded to not only miss but fall in their path as they attempted to field the fallen
softball. Kurt took his allegiance to the Bombers one step further as he bravely
redirected a blistering line drive from Brokeback Bishop from short stop into the gap in
short center using nothing but the top of his foot. After which he also fell. “Kurt added
an extra two outs to every inning, and he doesn’t remember any of them,” commented
Bombers second basemen Joshua Focker.
Christopher “Tarzan” Corrigan, was brought in to relieve starting pitcher Beau
Andrescavage in the six inning, which is coincidently when he and Billdo showed up from
their all-male gang bang, bought drunk with bleeding assholes. “He doesn’t need any
warm up,” commented Billdo of his burly friend, “He’s been working his rotator cup on me
all morning.” Indeed he didn’t. With a smooth pitch eerily reminiscent of the reach-
around he gave Billdo earlier that morning the Bombers were lead flawlessly through the
last three innings and onto GOGOGOLD.
“There were several key factors that went into the turn around over the past year. I
feel the biggest however, were the offseason trades. We were able to acquire several
key players such as the Ruben Neumann, and even though he didn’t play do to a
nagging vaginal injury he was definitely there in spirit.” Commented team captain Neal
Gough in his post game press conference. “However in my opinion the biggest
difference was not the players the Bombers acquired but the twat waffles we were able to
get rid of. Steven “Dickhead” Galinski (see picture below) was a huge movc, we were
able to send him to the Chili Peppers were he flied out at ever at bat. The second major
offseason move was the release of Scott Carril, the only player in Olympic history with an
over-the-fence homerun last year. Scott tried at every at bat to duplicate his 30-second
heroics of last year and failed absolutely miserably flying out as often has his closet
lovers Justin Thacker and Dickhead Galinski. Speaking of Scott’s 30-second heroics,
Gen when you’re ready for a real man, Go Go has my number.” Concluded Neal.
After the game and fresh off his mud bath, courtesy of the Chili Peppers, team captain
Neal Gough named Chili Peppers Shortstop/belligerent drunk Kurtis Schreier as the MVP
for all the plays he made to help lead the Bombers to victory. He also gave honorable
mention to several players such Billdo, Tarzan, and Scott Hilpert for leaving their all-male
gangbang early to attend by the sixth inning, Corey and Rosell for moving the birthday
party of their daughter to not interfere with the festivities, Tom “the not gay Terrell”
Terrell for not being the gay Terrell, John Chester for waking up in Fenton 20 minutes
before game-time with no car and a sore asshole, “you should have attended the same
all-male gang bang as Scott, Tarzan and Billdo, it was closer”, Gerald Redden for
forfeiting like a pussy bitch, “you probably would have had an asthma attack walking to
first anyway” Also, last but not least, honorable mention goes to Scott Carril, Steven
“Dickhead” Galinski, and Justin “Roid Rage” Thacker for flying out a combined 15
times.
All in all it was a great day in the scrotum dome. The Bombers inserted their throbbing
cocks into the mouths of the Chili Peppers, gyrated twice, and shot a big load of victory
down the throat of their opponents.
Forest Hills 2 1 5 1 7 4 1 1 0 - 22
Ridge Heights 2 4 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 - 7
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| Forest Hills Captain Neal Gough. Forest Hills had never beat the Chili Peppers prior to the 2006 softball game |
| The Chili Peppers motto is: "If you can't beat em then you might as well moon em" |
| Neal and Steve had a bet before the game. Well, Neal's team won so Neal got to draw a dick on Steve's head. |
The first ever GGPO softball card
| The Chili Peppers throw Neal Gough into a big ass mud puddle |
Forest Hills Roster
Neal Gough
Mike Gough
Thomas Juan Worley
Scott Hilpert
Zec Bishop
Corey Wilmingham
Joey Evansco
Josh Dalechek
Matthew Mundy
Tarzan
Beau Andrescavage
Bill Donald
Tom Terrell
Ridge Heights Roster
Justin Gough
Aaron Wilkerson
Todd Althardt
Steve Galinski
Justin Thacker
Scott Carril
Joey Tilk
Danny Alvarez
Kurt Schreier
Sean Gregory
Tim Terrell
Derrick Baier
Dominick Divittorio
Neal Gough
Mike Gough
Thomas Juan Worley
Scott Hilpert
Zec Bishop
Corey Wilmingham
Joey Evansco
Josh Dalechek
Matthew Mundy
Tarzan
Beau Andrescavage
Bill Donald
Tom Terrell
Ridge Heights Roster
Justin Gough
Aaron Wilkerson
Todd Althardt
Steve Galinski
Justin Thacker
Scott Carril
Joey Tilk
Danny Alvarez
Kurt Schreier
Sean Gregory
Tim Terrell
Derrick Baier
Dominick Divittorio